Sunday, September 18, 2011

I miss you Becky

When I decided to name our first dog ' Rebecca' all our animal hater friends asked me why was I naming a dog after such an elegant name. I remember saying its the title of my favourite book ' Rebecca' by Daphne du Maurier. I saw this book lying around my bed for few days and decided it was time it was shelved especially after my hubby declaring it uninteresting to him. I mused for a while at its cover page and my love for the name. I often joked with my friends that had I not named 'becky' I would definitely name my daughter 'Rebecca'.

I assumed Becky would live forever. I assumed she could take care of herself being the oldest of our three dogs back home. But, she proved me wrong and left us all today morning. It surprises me that I cry for her. I always loved our dog 'Rachel' and my partiality was candid even among my family members. Becky ceased to exist to me since Rachu arrived. I often felt like a step mom to Becky even as I fed her, bathe her I felt guilty of loving Rachu more.

But I loved Becky for her responsible and mature nature and cool temperament which Rachu never acquired and never would. I could write on and on about my dogs and though I stay away from home I feel close to them than I have to many human relations.

It could sound crazy writing an euology for a dog but sometimes animals teach you to reflect on human emotions. Beck suffered from sores for more than 6 years and there are times you felt she would scratch to her death. There are times my mom wanted to kill Becky because she could not stand her suffer. But in all those moments when we spoke to Becky in her eyes I saw love for us. Despite the fact we caged her , despite the fact we seldom touched her because of her sores, she wagged her tail with all her vigour. She loved her baths and suffered patiently through her illness.

She is our second loss following our dad and her absence shall always hurt. Like every death of a known one does to me I for once wish if I could talk to Becky and touch her once again and I believe her death has taught me to make most of everything, every relationship today for once you shut your eyes tonight you never know if you wake again to mend the fences or greet the world.

Thanks for awakening my soul .

“Until one has loved an animal a part of one's soul remains unawakened.”- Anatole France


Chithra lekha said...

My condols for Becky.
I feel like the day I lost my Dinku. He was more than a dog to me. My brother really. But after Dinku i stopped loving my pets fearing to loose them.

SK said...

My heart goes out to you for this loss and to your family. I know that pets are family members and it is horrible to lose them. One never expects grief and it always hurts, and being away from them makes it worse somehow.

RMKM said...

Rresearch scholar, nice to see your blog after a long time.... feel sorry for Rebecca